Did you ever feel as if you’re just going through the motions of your own life? I’ll bet so. Most of us have been there at some point or another. At the location where you’re still putting one foot before another, but not really participated. We mostly know you can coast with this strategy once in a while once you really need to.
But it’s helpful to also recognize there are times when it is a terrible mistake. Where commitment makes all of the difference. When it comes to your health, the capacity to engage your whole devotion at will could be the difference between recovery from a serious illness and prematurely ending your life. What is it that prevents our whole commitment? Mostly, it is either despair or fear.
Sometimes the “one in the front of another” strategy happens in the face of despair. Often the grief will pass, allowing excitement for life to return. Something happens. A loved one passes away, a treasured relationship ends, you are given a shocking medical investigation, the carpet is pulled out from under you. Life as you knew it has ceased to exist.
Yet you’ve got commitments, which means you go on. Hopefully with time and compassion, you will bounce back. The grief will fade along with the”you” of you’ll be back. Hopefully nothing too dreadful will have occurred in your life while you’re gone. In the event of a health emergency, let us hope you can get yourself back into gear immediately. Grief is understandable. There’s a clear cause and effect at work, and it may be observed by others.
People understand why you have temporarily checked out. Furthermore, they will frequently go out of their way that will assist you bounce back. Fear differs. It’s invisible. It’s individual. Nobody else sees the situation rather how you do. But you are frozen. You can not push the buttons. Such is the means of fear. As a health coach focused on stress-reducing lifestyle changes, I see a great deal of people get hung up on fear. They’ve always been a certain way in their lifetime. They understand how they expect things to go when they remain steady on the rudder. They might not enjoy it much.
It can be creating long-term disappointment and distress. But in the short term, there aren’t many surprises. Ask them what they really want in life (the pursuit of that is an integral element in resolving anxiety ) and, if they are honest with themselves, they will without exception provide an answer that needs changing the”rules” they have been playing under. But they are too scared to do it! So they will hedge.
“Maybe I could consider it,” they will say. They’ll place one foot in front of another, vaguely turned toward the way where they aspire to go. But they won’t, notcommit to the journey. Too scary. No advance proof they will have the ability to make it. Easier to remain stuck at the comfy, even if it’s not exactly what they want. But sometimes a cozy effort is simply inadequate.
There are times when nothing short of a complete commitment will do just fine. Imagine this. You’re a student of the martial arts. You’re up for your first board break. The instructor says,”visualize your hands throughout the board, on the other side.” You strike. But you don’t visualize your hands behind the board. You’re not certain that you have the capability to make it through. Instead, you concentrate on your hands hitting the board. Going through the motions. Hand hitting the board hurts. Hand through the board doesn’t.
Nothing short of a complete commitment will set your hand through the plank! Even if you’ve never been to the other side before, you have got to play like you know you can get there. Bottom line on fear: People have a fear of committing to do something before they have already proven to themselves that they could do it. Life’s paradox is the fact that there are times when nothing short of a complete commitment will be sufficient to make the change into do it. This I know from experience! Your healthful solution is this.
Develop your tolerance for making responsibilities ahead of the”evidence” it could be done. Commit to preparing one healthy meal every day for a week. You don’t know now what you will think about, but have the assurance you will come up with something. Once you’ve got that one licked, then move on to something rougher. Make a game of it. What can you do next to challenge this”dedication muscle?” How do you strengthen it just a little more? Gradually increase until you reach a point where it does not bother you terribly to undertake a project you have never considered. Say, walking after a serious injury or healing cancer. The confidence you will commit from isn’t the assurance for that particular task. Rather, you will have conclusively proved to yourself that you are a person of your word. That having made a significant commitment, you’ll discover a way to follow it through.